Saying goodbye to toxic masculinity

So let me start this off by saying I know writing this as a male, in my late 20s, who has come from a decent upbringing probably doesn’t have the right to be talking about women’s issues.
That being said there have been a few things in the past couple of weeks which have no sat well with me and I feel that society needs to address. I mean we are in 2017 for goodness sake.
Now people who know me will know I have quite a short fuse and can get quite argumentative pretty quickly on subjects I feel people are out right wrong on.
One of these, being the treatment and idolisation of woman by ‘young men’.
Now again I know it is not my place to comment on any of this, but I wanted to throw my two cents in for good measure as the there have been a number of things I have seen in the press and on social media which I couldn’t believe I had scene.

The first of which was a man from Bristol deciding to play the piano on College Green 24-hours a day until a girl who had broken up with his would take him back.  (Read the full story here)
Some would view this as a massive romantic gesture, but the majority – and rightly so in my opinion – saw it as a bit creepy and a little bit desperate.
It was like something out of a rom-com film, but pause for a second and put yourself in that girls shoes. How pressured would you feel knowing that this guy is now in the worlds media trying to win you back. For me it stunk of a man flexing his muscle for his “right” to have a girl friends.
Once again I just want to reiterate I am by no means a feminist (I’m not a fan of the term a male feminist anyway) but I am neither an alpha male, if anything I am far more in touch with my feminine side than the muscle bound lad culture tribal tattoos we see on our TV screens.
The real kicker for me on this incident was that he had been with the girl for four-months claiming she was the “one”, I’m sorry but when my ex of nearly five years broke up with me I was a mess and I didn’t want to leave the house for almost six months. Again this is completely my own opinion – many may have through this the most chivalrous thing in an error of Tinder and dating apps, but for me the man in question took away the woman’s right to make a choice when he went public.

The a few days later I see an article about a band who I absolutely love (Alvvays), where a man jumped on stage during their show to try and kiss vocalist Molly Rankin.
Not only is that an invasion of personal space, but what gives that FAN!! the right to think he can climb up on stage and force himself upon a musician.
And again this got me thinking, I am a big music guy I like all sorts of music, but I have found in the last year or some I have been drawn to many indie-rock bands who have female vocalists. Not because they are a woman, but because I like the tone of their voices. Then it dawned on me there are a lot of write ups of these bands featuring the worlds ‘female fronted’ or ‘all girl band’ and why should their gender even come into it. If they are talented enough surely they should just be musicians.

Hey guys! If you shout “Get your tits out” at a show to a girl in the ring, and get called out for it, don’t argue your case. You have none.

— Jimmy Havoc (@JimmyHavoc) September 23, 2017

 

Then came the straw that broke the camels back which made me write this post. So many of you will know I am a huge wrestling fan, and this weekend (September 23/24) there was a big event in Wolverhampton – I was unable to attend.
Now I had seen really positive things about the event apart from one tweet about a member of the crowd shouting misogynistic things to one of the women wrestlers – who incidentally was in a match with men and absolutely killing it.
One of the wrestlers on the show called out the guy (kudos to Jimmy Havoc) but this then erupted out of nowhere on twitter. Someone who supposedly works in the industry and runs a ‘reputable’ podcast said women in wrestling are there to be objectified.
Again this is 2017 and anything like this needed to be called out, hence me writing this post.
What really concerned me was with how much conviction this person was defending his position, it was left gobsmacked.

If this is still the attidue of men in what many considered to be quite a progressive generation it really is quite worrying, and all I would like to do is for all men who are not so pig minded to call out misogynists.

Advertisement

Opening my mind to more knowledge

So I am not usually one for the whole blogging thing, I started one years ago and it just ended up being a place where I wrote reviews etc.
However, as I have grown up and my writing has developed I feel like I can safely put why thoughts down in writing.
Let me say right off the bat, this is not something that is going to be updated regularly, I will just post things when I feel like there is something I need to talk about.
Whether that be personal stuff, work related stuff, things in the news, topics that have cropped up in the music / film / wrestling industry I just want to write for me, which is something I rarely get to do.
That being said this first post is going to be how I perceive the industry in which I work. The Media!!

Now I am not going to act like I am a expert on media analysis or anything like that, but we are in an age where we are bombarded with news – of which the majority is pretty bleak.
I will admit even in my day job the buzz of a big story coming in does get you excited, and even if the subject matter is not the most savoury you can’t help but think about delving in and finding out everything you can.
However, that being said we as the media also have a duty to report all the bad.
This Friday (September 15, 2017) an explosive device went of in a tube carriage in South London and this dominated the headlines all day, and rightly so.
But how many people, especially in the UK, knew about the Icelandic government falling due to child molestation cover ups? If you didn’t hear then find out more HERE.

For those unaware the country’s Prime Minister resigned over cover ups involving his father and many believe there are others in government who were involved. This resignation has led to a potential second snap election in less than a year.
Why am I telling you this you may ask? Well when I heard about it I asked my head of news and he didn’t have a clue and it is alarming that there is probably a huge number of people that didn’t have a clue this was happening.
It might be because I am in the industry, but I want to know everything that is going on in the world and for those running country’s to be held accountable. The reporting of what is going on in Iceland in the UK seems very much a case of the nimby’s (No In My Back Yard) and people either not aware or turning a blind eye.

I mean at the time of writing this, there is an article buried on the BBC news website – a site which is meant to be a credible news source – something I had to actively have to search to find.
The point I am trying to make, is that maybe we as a society need to open our eyes a bit more, we try and be self-conscious to help those in our community, but maybe we need to boarded our horizons.
Ok there may be a lot of news out their to consume, but rather than just focusing on terror attacks, what idiotic thing Donald Trump is going to do next or if North Korea are going to blow up the world, maybe become a bit more knowledgeable about the world in general.
That’s what I am to do from now on.